this morning felt blurrier than the normal

you weren’t next to me and it felt so catatonic

we are all used to a feeling and when it’s gone,

there is a loss of words and an empty space

the space is in the bed, in my heart and on my mind

seems we’ve come so far only to say we lost it

this afternoon felt like stepping on ice

gliding with no one to slide towards

we only remember the anger and now the lonliness is overwhelming

i wonder if it’s all worth it and i contemplate if this was the answer

this evening crept like death and tortured like metal

i craved your touch and your smell and she wants you too

this is the beginning of every day new and after

and i’m picking up the pieces

time to move on from the nights away and the mornings of illness

time to carry a good head and a healthy heart

ready to make you my love

now ready to make you my past

could be more insignificant

maybe hindsight truly is 20/20

should be desperately lifeful

but pink tastes so much better

sad to think of a loss

pushed to believe in a win

someone said you create your own misery

could i be the chosen one

or the one chosing

life is full of perfection

why do i hurdle over mine

trust is underwhelming and love is undermining

where is my happy medium

pick the softess touch and the closest feel

i believe we had it

now where do i begin

today i paid attention to your arm around my chest and it felt pretty

today chase sang to my profile and bella kept her sweater on

today i got out of this cage and it reminded me of what the outside should be

someone said look at the beautiful, intelligent, depressed girl and why

how right, look at what i can trust and love and how easy it is to say

i will continue to take the next step, to reach my hands out, to sneak a smile

thanks for bearing it with me and taking advantage of the happiness i promise

i promise, you will soon see